Chick-fil-A   Murphy & Wylie

BUILDING RELATIONSHIPS

CROSS CULTURALLY

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A leader's ability to build relationships is one of the most important skills that they can learn.  It not only makes you more enjoyable to work with as a leader, but it also builds a platform for you to influence your team positively as you lead them in the business.  Of course, building relationships at all levels is necessary and valuable, but especially as the workplace becomes more and more diverse, it is important to know how to build relationships cross-culturally as well.  

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Think through the following questions:

• Do you try to build relationships in the workplace?  Why or why not?  Can you see how there might be value in building strong relationships in the workplace?

• Who do you typically build relationships within the workplace?  Are most of your relationships with likeminded individuals, or do you have intentional relationships with those who might have different experiences, thoughts, or cultural backgrounds?

• Do you find it easy to build relationships with others or is it challenging?  What helps you build relationships with others and what are challenges or barriers to building relationships with others, especially cross culturally?

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Our natural tendency is to gravitate to relationships with individuals who are like minded or share a lot of similarities with our life experiences or viewpoint.  However, great leaders are able to build relationships across their team, even with those who may have different and diverse experiences and viewpoints.  Review the four behaviors to building relationships cross culturally (be positive, be genuine, be vulnerable, be intentional).  Though these behaviors can be used to build relationships with most any individual, they are essential for building relationships cross culturally.  First, having a positive attitude is a behavior that can cross cultural boundaries and language barriers almost immediately.  People are naturally drawn to people who smile and are encouraging to others. Next, being genuine prepares our hearts to truly care about others and learn more about them, their cultural background, and experiences.  Not only do we need to have a genuine curiosity about others, but we have to be willing to be vulnerable about our own lives.  We need to be careful not to place the value of our culture over others, and be willing to learn how others may think and behave differently than us just simply due to their cultural upbringing and influences.  Finally, you have to be intentional about building relationships cross culturally.  There are many barriers such as language, traditions, world views, and much more that can naturally drive a wedge in relationships cross culturally and it takes true intentionality to build a relationship with someone from a different cultural background.  

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Think through the following questions:

• Do you demonstrate a positive attitude towards others?  Do you find yourself smiling and encouraging others or do you tend to come off negative and unapproachable? 

• Do you genuinely care about others and desire to get to know them?  Do you take the time to ask them great questions and listen to what someone has to say?  Are you also vulnerable and willing to share your true self with others, or do you struggle making yourself transparent to others?

• How intentional are you about building relationships in the workplace, especially with those who may  have different world views than you?  Do you go out of your way to build relationships with others or do you just focus on relationships that are convenient or comfortable for you?

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TAKE ACTION

Building relationships with anyone takes time and effort, but building relationships cross culturally requires intentionality.  However, leaders who are able to build relationships with all their team members will have a broader perspective and be able to lead in a way that engages their entire team and not just a particular segment.  See if you can use these four behaviors of building relationships over the next 30 days to enrich some of your relationships with team members in the business. 

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• REFLECT INWARD - take some time to personally reflect on your attitude towards building relationships with others in the business?  Do you model the four behaviors mentioned above, or are there areas that you need to work on that can help you better build relationships with others?

• FOCUS OUTWARD - identify two to three people in the business who you do not have a strong relationship with.  Maybe it's someone who you don't work with a lot, or maybe someone who doesn't share the same interests as you, or maybe it is someone you have a hard time connecting with from a language and cultural perspective.  Take some time over the next 30 days to genuinely get to learn more about them.  See how much you can learn about them, their family, their culture, and their world view.  If you feel like there are things they don't want to share, then be vulnerable and share with them about your own life and experiences.  Utilize the translation tools in Additional Resources to help you with any language barriers that you may face.

• GROW FORWARD - take time to reflect over your new relationships at the end of 30 days.  How have building these new relationships positively influenced you as an individual?  Have they positively influenced you as a leader?  Do you have a new perspective as a leader that you maybe didn't originally have before?

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CHARACTERISTICS OF MASTERY

Consistently leads with a positive, encouraging, and motivating attitude; smiles and genuinely cares about others; takes the time to ask questions to learn about others and listens first before seeking to be understood; is vulnerable and transparent with others and willing to admit flaws, mistakes, and life experiences with others; demonstrates intentionality in building relationships with all members of the team; utilizes all available resources to break down communication and cultural barriers with others on the team.

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ADDITIONAL RESOURCES

1. "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie​

2. "Crazy Cycle in the Workplace" by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs (Right Now Media)

3. Google Translate (great for voice and conversational translation)

4. Microsoft Translate (great for translating webpages and large amounts of text)